fairyballerina's Xanga

[exhaustion]

Mon, 20 Oct 2008 20:00:36 GMT

I am so run down. I can't believe it's only Monday.

We spent Saturday at Brookhurst school, doing some gardening and work around the grounds....and constructing a greenhouse. There were no instructions, no pictures of what it should look like, just hundreds and hundreds of peices that had to be fitted together. It took us 7 hours, but we did it. We were there til 6.45pm after everyone went home before lunch. And just as we were putting the final touches to it, we discovered that two crucial parts (holding the roof onto the base) were upside down...so had to take the roof off, turn them round, put it back together.

Then today Hannah found the instructions on the internet. Apparantly it only takes 2-3 hours. When you have the instructions.

So yeah, that was our weekend. And now it's Monday and I'm already exhausted and have that horrible "i'm getting a cold" feeling fuzzing away at the back of my throat. Think I'm going to go to bed.

I also have muscle ache. We bought a Wii Fit. Most. Fun. EVER. You can do hula hooping and snowboarding and ski jumping and yoga and muscle toning and everything. I spent ages on it yesterday and can barely walk today. Oops.

[chilli tuna]

Tue, 14 Oct 2008 18:00:55 GMT

I just cooked tuna pasta bake for dinner, and when I went to put a 'dash' of chilli powder in, I accidentally dropped at least a tablespoons worth in there. That was an interesting culinary experience. It was (just about) edible.....but a little hot.

I'm so bored. Ben's at music practice this evening and I've already done the washing up and am successfully avoiding work because that won't help with the boredom....I might play on the Wii. Oh yeah, we bought a Wii. SO MUCH FUN. I love it. It was the last of our wedding gift money, and we don't have a TV license so we need some way to entertain ourselves....ha.

Boredy bored bored.

Oh. I cut all my hair off. Well, I didn't, a hairdresser did.

See! Long hair was driving me crazy, I was never happy with it and it was in awful condition. So I had a day off last Thursday (what a novelty) and went to Alexander James in Leamington (they were fantastic, and quite cheap too) and went for the chop.

That's pretty much all the excitement going on right now - chilli, wii and haircut.

[pasta hut]

Tue, 07 Oct 2008 12:21:09 GMT

errr...what?

On a similar note, they are apparantly bringing back the name Opal Fruits for the 10th anniversary of Starburst! I have no idea why brand names bother us so much, we always feel like we have an affiliation to a particular brand name and get all upset when they change it. There is a genuine sadness in my heart for the loss of Pizza Hut, and an inexplicable delight at the return of Opal Fruits.

I might go and buy a Wispa.

[last day of freedom]

Mon, 15 Sep 2008 10:01:55 GMT

So life got hectic all of a sudden. I spent last week working in a school in Leamington, absolutely LOVED it and made me crave teaching even more...tomorrow I start at uni which will be good - that horrible fresher feeling is back though, where I have no idea what to expect and feel like I have to think out every part of my outfit and my pencil case and my hairstyle in order to impress people, because if you don't talk to people this week you end up not really knowing anyone, even though the people I talk to this week probably won't end up being the ones I'm close to. Ah the joys of starting uni!
I feel 18 again.

So today I have to read read read read read. I went to the uni library on Saturday to read all the books I couldn't find elsewhere and they had none in, they are all out until 2009...why?! So I have to tell my tutor that I haven't done the recommended audits and stuff....which I'm hoping doesn't give a bad first impression because I'm going to need my tutor to be on my side this year!

I'm such a worrier. Ben tells me off for it. I'm sure it'll all be great and once I get there it'll just happen and be fine, but the day before...worryworryworry.

And on top of all that we have our flatwarming on Friday which will be really fun but also a nightmare to organise as Ben and I will now be out of the house full time and Ben probably won't get in til 7.30 on Friday. Apparantly he might have to go to Carlisle soon, overnight again. This was NOT in the job description. Well, apparantly it was but I don't remember it.

And then on Sunday we have to go down to Weston-Super-Mare for Ben's cousins baptism. Which will be lovely, it will be nice to see all the family again who we haven't seen since the wedding.

Then next Thursday is my nan's funeral in London. She died last week which was a bit of a shock. She's been in hospital for ages with a broken hip, and they found all sorts of other problems that they could fix while she was in there, and then they had this big meeting a couple of weeks ago with all the nurses and carers and her and my mum and some aunties and uncles to decide what happens when she's ready to leave hospital, and they decided she'd have an operation to solve some of her throat problems and then go into a nursing home and she seemed happy with that and it all looked really positive. Then the next day she took all her feeding tubes out and said that she didn't want to carry on anymore. She died in the early hours of Sunday morning, last week. My mum rang me at 3am. They'd all been called in and mum had been there when it happened which she appreciated. It's strange though, one of those things that actually has a massive impact on your life...my nan isn't around anymore, it changes a lot, and yet you have no idea that it's going to happen. We woke up one day and were told she'd decided to die. She was very positive about it, she's a christian and all she kept saying was she wanted to go home, she wasn't happy, she wasn't comfortable, and she just kept saying "I just want to be with Jesus". Which actually, is pretty brave. She took out all her tubes and had morphine to relieve the pain. Mum and some of her sisters sat with her all day and all night leading up to her dying. Mum had been staying down the road on the night she died, with another sister sleeping at the hospital.

But it's just one of those things that you can't get your head around. Your world changes in a week. And I can't imagine what my mum is going through. She's organised the funeral and everything and is working so hard to keep all the family happy (my mum is one of 10 kids).

So lots has gone on. Life suddenly got hectic and yet today I'm back in my pyjamas at midday, reading the Times Education Supplement and waiting for Ben to get home. It's the last day I can do this, tomorrow the busyness of a PGCE hits and I'm a 9-5er. I need to go to town actually, buy a 'Unirider' ticket for the bus into campus. Should probably get dressed....

[home alone]

Tue, 26 Aug 2008 15:14:08 GMT

So....Ben is away 'on business'. Taking vibration readings from the side of the A14. They told him to take an overnight bag to work today just in case he had to stay over til tomorrow....he rang at 9am to say he'd got to work and they'd told him he has to stay there til Friday.

So I am all alone. For the next 3 days. With nothing to do except reading for my PGCE which is really stressful and I could do with knowing that at the end of a day of reading Ben will come and give me a cuddle and make me a cup of tea.

Pretty rubbish. I still don't know anyone here really, I texted Holly and Jenny to see if they want to come and watch a film tonight but haven't had a reply...and I can't go anywhere because I don't drive and we have no money for trains.

So if anyone wants to come and stay for a couple of days and keep me company they would be very welcome. I hate being on my own, especially for so long in a town that I don't really know with no friends around! We're back to the long distance thing that I thought we solved with marriage!

I'm not in a very good mood. I need conversation and company!

[day 4]

Thu, 21 Aug 2008 08:28:14 GMT

I am in such a BAD mood today. I have no idea why, nothing's happened to make me cross but I'm just in a grump! In a mood where I just want to go back to bed and wake up when Ben gets home and start all over again. But whenever I've gone back to bed after Ben goes to work i wake up at lunchtime feeling rough as anything. And I always have crazy dreams when I sleep in the daytime. Like, I think people are in the room and wake up unable to move and stuff. It really scares me.

Ben was at work for 12 hours yesterday, which sucked, by the time he gets home and we've eaten dinner it's like, 10. Today he is back to normal though and left at 8 and will be back at 6. Oooh and we realised that this weekend is a BANK HOLIDAY! We should be going to Greenbelt, but we can't afford it, so we aren't...but Ben still gets Monday off, which is nice.

I think I might write some thankyou cards. I feel awful that I haven't done them yet.

I looked through my PGCE preparation pack yesterday. I have so much reading to do, I'm going to have to get the bus into Warwick Uni and go to the library, but I'm terrified of doing it on my own, I hate going places I don't know on my own. And they said in my 'personal preparation recommendation' that the guy who interviewed me saw a need for me to spend more time in an early years setting, from Nursery-Y2. I'm really confused, I don't want to sound full of myself but I have spent more time in a school than most of the people I met on interview day. I WORKED IN A NURSERY for 2 years (ok, it was just in the holidays, but that adds up to...10 months or more?)!!! And I volunteered in a Year 1 class one day a week for 2 years while I was at Uni and have done about 3 weeks in a year 2 over the last few years. My dissertation was on Early Years settings and I spent hours and hours observing for that. I don't understand what more they want? I'm doing a pre-PGCE placement in a couple of weeks where I have to observe Y1 and 2....I really hope I don't get there and they tell me I should have done more. Although to be fair that pack arrived the week before the wedding, which was 2 weeks before the summer holidays...when was I supposed to have done this observation?! The thing is, I don't remember the interviewer asking me how much experience I had, I think he asked IF I had experience and I started to tell him about the work I was doing in St Josephs and he interrupted me...so maybe he doesn't know what he's talking about...maybe he says that to everyone?

I do not know.

I am so bored.

Thankyou letters here I come.

[Day 2]

Tue, 19 Aug 2008 10:41:27 GMT

So, I am sitting in the flat eating a ham and peppadew sandwich and a packet of Skips.

This morning I have done even more washing and watched the special features on the scrubs DVD.

I'm going to go into town this afternoon - at the moment we only have 1 front door key so I need to get one cut and try and find Ben an umbrella for work - he's not too happy about taking my little blue girly brolly.

Small bit of excitement though, yesterday my new cards and chequebook came through, with Mrs Elizabeth J Munday written on them, and I had a phonecall from the bank that our joint bank account is now set up so we can finally pay in all the chques we got given to "Mr and Mrs Munday". Seems like a lovely idea to address it to both of us but we haven't been able to pay them in because banks won't accept cheques addressed to two people unless you have a joint bank account.

Boredyboredybored. Tonight Ben and I are going for a meal (we have a voucher for the Slug and Lettuce!) and some drinks at the top of town to celebrate our month-iversary. I can't believe we've been married a month, in some ways it feels like it's been longer (honeymoon is a distant memory...) but in other ways we still feel very new to this whole marriage thing. Mental.

[My name is Elizabeth Janette Munday, and I am a housewife]

Mon, 18 Aug 2008 09:19:50 GMT

Ben started work today. I got up at 6.45, made him breakfast and a cup of tea, admired him in a suit, gave him his packed lunch....and then he left to get his train at 7.25. Since then, I have sat here bored out of my mind.

The last 4 weeks (yep, we've been married a month tomorrow) we have lived in each others pockets, obviously on honeymoon (which was so lovely, I want to go back) and then the last 2 weeks have just been spent hanging out in our flat, making it look lovely (which it does, it's pretty much the best flat in the world), shopping (how I wish it was for clothes - our new shops of choice are robert dyas, argos and asda). I kind of thought that at the end of this four weeks I'd be glad to have a bit of space. But I'm just really lonely! It's been really great spending that much time together and we've constantly had people round, Andy spent a couple of days recording, Holly's been round most days, because we are right in the centre of town we are well located for pubbing it, and Ben never has to drive home! I cooked dinner for 6 people the other night - us, Ben's parents and his grandparents, which was the most intimidating thing ever but it went really well and I think they were quite impressed with my cooking! And then Dan and BenB came to stay at the weekend, which was lovely (though pretty manic). So now, sitting here in absolute silence, I'm at a bit of a loss.

I do have things to do. Our bedroom is a mess (I live with a BOY. There are dirty socks on the floor and boxers in the bathroom. We went and bought a laundry basket the other day which I put right at the end of Ben's side of the bed, the exact spot he throws his dirty clothes anyway. It makes no difference). So I will spend the day sweeping the floor, doing the washing, tidying the bedroom. I'll eat lunch on my own, then do some PGCE reading and then cook dinner ready for my husbands return. My feminist sociology lectures would weep if they saw me now. But it's not really an issue of subordination, it's boredom. And to be honest (but don't tell Ben) I quite enjoy the whole dutiful wife thing. I like making the place look nice, and I've never really minded doing the washing and stuff. Plus we have a load of amazing gadgets and new things off the wedding list - ironing is a dream with plush John Lewis ironing board and brand new iron (after the teatowel-on-the-kitchen-table and clean-the-iron-before-you-use-it of student living) and we have a coffee machine and a juicer and an amazing kettle...

Oh dear. I sound like a middle aged wifey type. It will all change when my course starts and it's ready meals for all.

The worst bit is that I had a list of people I could call this week if I got bored (it's a small list, I don't know many people in Leamington at all), and then realised they are all away...Ben's parents are in France on holiday, and it's St Bees this week so Alasdair and Holly and everyone else is there. And I'm only what, 4 hours into the first day. I have 3 weeks of this...although the aforementioned people will be back next week....but still. What do I do in two hours when I've tidied the house and run out of washing? I don't know how I'm going to stop myself shopping. We have absolutely NO money, because Ben doesn't get paid until the end of next month, so I'm not allowed to shop but I am so near the shops! And there's a starbucks two minutes walk away with PEOPLE in it....I miss people!!! We don't even have real internet (it's Ben's dad's USB 3 thing that you can't download anything on and is reaaally slow - we have internet coming on Thursday) so I can't even play about on facebook or upload all the wedding and honeymoon photos and we don't have a TV - well, we do have a TV, it's massive, but we don't have an aerial cable so we can't watch TV. I've pretty much exhausted our Flight of the Conchords and Scrubs DVD's. I'M SO BORED!

[Mrs E J Munday]

Thu, 07 Aug 2008 09:06:26 GMT

I am writing this from our new flat (according to Debenhams, 9 Packington Palace) which is pretty nice. It's all furnished and our gift list came so we have a juicer and a steamer and the coolest kettle you ever saw.

We aren't quite unpacked yet (unPackington Place), it's all piled high in the spare room but it feels like HOME. It's really odd that I now live in Leamington. A whole new town to learn my way around, but I'm looking forward to it. So far living here has been a bundle of fun, Holly is still around for the summer and Andy is about a bit so we've been to the pub (I'm learning which are nice and which are not....and that Robbins Well has a very dodgy pool table and Satchwells on a Tuesday is full of kids pretending to be adults) and to Ikea and today Andy is coming over and him and Ben are going to make music while I unpack some more.

I love it. I took lots of photos yesterday that I will upload as soon as we have proper internet...at the moment we are using Ben's dad's 3 mobile broadband thing so can't use much internet.

But it's all good. And we have lots of champagne and left-over wedding cake so you are all welcome to come and visit.

Friday, July 18, 2008

Fri, 18 Jul 2008 21:16:37 GMT

I am getting married in the morning